They are approach (going toward good, helpful, survival-promoting things) and avoidance (moving away from bad, dangerous, deadly things). Research by social psychologist Shelly Gable suggests that romantic relationships are happier when theyre driven by approach rather than avoidance motives. So, say your girlfriend asks that you put food-encrusted plates in the dishwasher instead of leaving them out for the archeologists to find. An approach motivation means doing as she asks because youre striving for a positive outcome like making her feel loved instead of trying to avoid a negative one, like having your fate in showbiz patterned after that first guy in a horror movie who gets curious about the weird growling in the basement. The research suggests that you can happy up your relationship by reframing why you do things shifting to an I just wanna make her happy motivation. To do that, set aside your career fears and just try to be fair to both of you. The relationship may fizzle out. Even so, if you dont do anything horrible to Daddys little girl, therell be no reason for him to see to it that you look back on a lifetime of iconic roles like White Guy With Umbrella and Bystander #5. (c)2017, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405, or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com ( advicegoddess.com ). Weekly radio show: blogtalkradio.com/amyalkon Order Amy Alkons book, Good Manners For Nice People Who Sometimes Say The F*c k (St.
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Photo: Tyler White Image 22 of 26 The vacant Solo Serve building at 114 Soledad St. is in the process of being demolished by construction workers in downtown San Antonio. A hotel will be taking its place in the future. The vacant Solo Serve building at 114 Soledad St. is in the process of being demolished by construction workers in downtown San Antonio. A hotel will be taking its place in the future. Photo: Tyler White Image 23 of 26 The vacant Solo Serve building at 114 Soledad St. is in the process of being demolished by construction workers in downtown San Antonio. A hotel will be taking its place in the future.
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